You’re the Inspiration…
Growing up I remember getting asked who my role model was. I never really had one. I always just wanted to be me- or Barbie with the body and the boy and the dream house and all those careers. (I didn’t care about Ken’s anatomical problems in those days) I feel like role model is a tough label to give. To me it implies that there is only one and that is who you should look to be like. I still stand by my little seven year old self and just want to be me.
But there is something to being inspired by someone. Again, looking back, inspiration was something that was huge and in the moment. In my adult life there is that inspiration. I get a compliment with work and I think I am going to kill it and here is my grandiose plan. Or it’s January 1st and I’ve laid out a million ways I am going to get in shape and there is no way I can fail. These are all inspiring moments. But I’ve also come to listen to the more quiet moments that inspire. I have been thinking about what inspires me a lot lately. Probably due to the New Year, but then last night I was inspired again by a friend reaching out to thank others for their support in her recent journeys.
Years ago I got a call from her that woke me up way too early in the morning for me (so like 10am) Her boyfriend just texted her to break up. Besides this being such a shitty thing to do, they were living together, they had been together for years upon years, she took care of his kids when they were in town, and he was in his 30s. Too late to be acting like a teenage boy. I jumped up and ran to her side to help her. She was simply amazing. She hosted a bunch of her friends the way a TV mom would. She was gracious and beautiful and smart, and sad. I’m assuming, knowing her and the situation, she was probably fuming as well. BUT that was not what stuck out. What stuck out was just us having the greatest time with her that day. I know she was heartbroken. And I know there were tears and there was anger because who wouldn’t have it. But she never strayed away from who she was at the core, even at her saddest or most angry moment. In a million years I couldn’t have spoken so eloquently about this time at the time. But since then I’ve reflected on that memory so often. It always just stands out to me.
Yesterday I realized all the poignancy of why it has stuck with me. She inspired me. She inspired me all this time. She reminded me to hold on to me no matter what happens. She reminded me to find joy even in the worst of situations and to laugh at the ridiculousness of life. She taught me to open my heart to friends when it feels like closing for other reasons.
As I am on my high for my resolutions for the year, it’s nice to hold on to the quiet inspirations as well. The ones that don’t affect me in the moment and yet I keep coming back to. I hold on to those tighter. I like them better. They are more realistic. And they cut much more to the core of who I want to be and what I want to do.
So big and small what inspires you?
Posted on January 10, 2016, in Beauty is Confidence and tagged barbie, break up by text, freinds, French picnic, Inspiration, New Year's Resolutions, Paris picnic, Resolutions, role model, role models. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.